speak out about the story that just won't go away...
From: SCHERRYJX Date: Sun, 19 May 1996 To: aschnedr@cais.com Subject: O.J. verdict
I am so happy that "I" can get a chance to air my opinion, since everyone
has. So how long are you all going to beat a dead horse, O.J. Simpson was
found not guilty of murder, so when are you all going to give it a rest?
I am so sick and tired of people making O.J. Simpson your whipping boy.
Personally, I don't care for O.J. one way or the other, but hasn't the
media being slanting the news in its portrayal of this man (in a negative
way)? You all (the media) make me sick!!!! If don't like this man why don't
you all just leave the man alone?????!!!!! I think you get off on calling
his name. Have you made enough money off him, huh huh huh????? Where were
all you justice-oriented people when EMMITT TILL and other black people
were being lynched, murdered and assaulted by "good white people?" You
all only want "justice" only when they're blond and blue-eyed and I'm
prejudiced. You all just make me want to puke!!!!
Thank you,
Scherryjx
Hello, Scherry.
Thanks very much for writing and expressing your opinion, strong
as it may be. First, let's get one thing out of the way. The Daily
Muse hasn't made a cent off O.J. or anything else for that matter
(but we are looking for sponsors). Second, if O.J. didn't want
the publicity, why would he go on national TV and tell his story to
millions of Brits? Third, (yes, there is a third) terrible and
uncondonable as they were, we were probably not even born or too
young to know when those lynchings were commonplace. And fourth, our
work is intended as parody. Any seriousness taken from our site is
non-refundable! Hope you come back to The Daily Muse--we update often
(almost daily)--and tell your friends about us, too.
From: J.C.Gordon
Date: Wed, 15 May 96
To: aschnedr@cais.com
Subject: Where was I?
The Misus and I wanted to "send" OJ somewhere he could relax,
get away from it all, and most of all regain his stature as the
macho-hero he desperately wants to again be. The UK seemed like a strange
place to start, we think he should go to BRAZIL! Where else can a
man murder his wife (or at least, simply be accused of murdering his wife
or lover), and keep face in the community? Ok, so he'll have to study
a new language, but there's media and money in Brazil...shouldn't be too
long before he's back selling ads and has his face on every six-pack of
steak knives. ("Your wife been looking for a job, been unfaithful or just
plain uppity? Get yourself the new Ginsu starter set and put 'em in the
kitchen where she can see 'em...where she knows how much you 'care,'
she'll never get those silly ideas again!") Maybe the UK is just a
bad jumpoff to Argentina? By the way, the locals in my office refer
to taking the afternoon off to play golf as "looking for the real killers."
Keep up the good work!
jcgordon
How about an O.J. Country-of-the-Month Club? ("If it's April it must
be Belize!")
From: Randy (of the Feather River Canyon News) Date: Wed, 07 Aug 1996 To: aschnedr@cais.com Subject: Compromise Proposed compromise to the split in the Repub platform on abortion: Abort only viable fetuses and implant them in aliens (females only for the time being), and pay them to carry the babies to term while on welfare and AFDC. BINGO! Three problems solved at once!! The babies live, the mothers who don't want the babies don't have to carry them, the right-to-lifers get to see the babies live, and the aliens fulfill the work-fare requirements. No... four problems! It gets better all the time!! LET'S ALL VOTE REPUBLICAN!!! God, did I say that?!
From: Jim Dahlheimer Date: Wed, 29 May 1996 To: aschnedr@cais.com Subject: Guilty! Too bad Clinton's not a Republican! Just imagine if three of Bob Dole's friends had been found guilty. You liberals would have been up all night writing pages of copy on how it all leads to Dole (and Reagan). What a joke you guys are!
From: Lamar Date: Mon, 17 Jun 1996 To: aschnedr@cais.com Subject: Lamar Alexander
Hi, I was reading your "article" on Lamar Alexander, and I am offended by your reasoning against electing Alexander. I wouldn't mind if you gave some real reasons for not electing him, but you gave stupid, unhumorous, pathetic reasons. What is wrong with the name Lamar?--My name is Lamar, and it is also the name of thousands of Americans. Lamar is a true American name, and there is nothing wrong with it. It would suit a President perfectly. Your article was a waste of typing.
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